First EuroDisney. Now…this?

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“For $10 extra, I could kick you in the nuts, too!”

There’s nothing more jolting than logging onto your own blogsite after 2 weeks and being greeted by a photo of a grinning David Beckham in a mullet. Yikes! Sorry, I should’ve posted something else by now, something equally tragi-comic, yet rumbling with disturbing undertones. I’m happy to report I’ve found it:

After all the drama over NAFTA and immigration laws in the US, I’m pleased to see Mexico is taking the effects of globalization into their own hands, yet with a distinctly shameless American twist: como se dice Theme Park, La Migra style?

I once met this Mexican dude studying English in NYC at a language exchange. He told me of how he once went on a partial pilgrimage towards the Texan border to see the Hell on Earth illegal immigrants go through to get to our gilded borders, where after earning $20 a week washing dishes or mowing lawns for years, their children may one day earn to right to get shot in a far-off middle eastern country for our president. If he had known about Parque EcoAlberto, he could have saved himself a lot of trouble.

According to a darkly comic article in the Sunday NY Times Travel Section (next to an article on clubs in Buenos Aires), smack in the state of Hidalgo, Mexico (nowhere near the actual border) the 3,000 acre park is owned by native Hñahñu Indians who have set up the ultimate surrealist tourist attraction: a simulated overnight journey of crossing the Rio Grande into the USA, complete with slippery, untrustworthy guides (“coyotes”), barbed wire, mud, and mules, and of course, a run-in with the dreaded Border Patrol, who chase you and fire blanks (yay! fun!). For 200 pesos ($18), all this can be yours.

Now, I don’t know how I feel about this. Would it be wrong to create a simulated Iraqi Green Zone and have snipers shoot at you while you run from building to building whilst dragging a wounded and bleeding comrade (an Equity-certified actor, of course) so we can appreciate what our soldiers are going through over there? I think there would be something a bit deranged about that. But I guess all in the name of free commerce. If you build it, they will come….

~ by Jeff on February 5, 2007.

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